Excerpts from The 1821 North Georgia Gazette, Winter Chronicle nos. 1-3

Originally POSTED ON  on the now-defunct Lantern Daily blog

In honor of the most recent Green Lantern exhibit, Isolated Fictions, this week I’m going to post a variety of smaller bits and pieces from the December 9, 1819 issue of The North Georgia Gazette. Also, I’ve been culling images, in particular, from this site which contains a history of expeditions for The Northwest Passage.

Winter Chronicle No. 1

To The Editor of The Winter Chronicle.

Sir,

A remark which appeared in your first Number, that you were willing to “admit questions which may exercise the ingenuity of your readers,” &c., has encouraged me to propose one, which, perhaps may be considered as answering that description. It is said that instances have occurred of the sinking of ice, and this in seas (for example of Spitzbergen and Davis’ Straights) nearly as salt as the main ocean, and which the temperature is seldom or never more than ten degrees about the freezing point of salt-water. It is evident that the ice cannot sink till its specific gravity exceed that of the fluid in which it is immersed. I should be glad to be informed by any of your Correspondents, by what possible combination of circumstances so unusual a condition might be brought about.

I am, Mr. Editor,

&c. &c &c.,

SCEPTICUS.

To The Editor of The Winter Chronicle

Mr. Editor–I wish you well–indeed I do–but the more I try to compose anything for the paper, the more stupid I find myself. Being desiroius, however, to offer my humble services in some way or other, this is to inform you, that I am a tolerable hand at making pens, though but an indifferent one at using them; and I cannot help thinking, that I might be of use to several of your Correspondents, for I judge by their styles, that some of them write with too hard a pen, and some with a very soft one. I could mention three of four, whose cramped manner indicates a devilish stiff nib, Mr. Editor, and as many whose pens have certainly no point at all. i confess thatthepens of most of your Correspondents require little or no mending, but even the best of them would be be the worse for a fresh nib, which might, perhaps, set them a-going with fresh vigor–so if you choose to employ me in this way, you shall be welcome to the humble services of

TIMOTHY QUILL-SPLITTER

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Winter Chronicle No. 2

 

Bill of Damages Referred to in the Foregoing Memorial

To a sever fit of headache, on receiving news of the said affair.

To a two-hours’ lecture from my wife, for daring to be sick without her leave.

To pay of six strong-lunged hawkers, for crying about the “Defense of Reporter Trim,” for two days.

To the hire of two female ballad-singers, a bankrupt bellows-mender, and a dog without a tail, roaring a song calledTrim and Trim’s Ghost, through various streets, lanes and alleys.

To the loss of forty-eight hours’ sleep already, and the probably loss of as many more.

To the cure of a brooken nose, two black eyes, and a scratched face, received from my wife for letting her and the children starve.

To total loss of business, impediments, obstructions, &c. &c., cause by the said fraud.

Winter Chronicle No. 3

ADVERTISEMENTS

WANTED, a middle-aged WOMAN, not above thirty, of good character, to assist in DRESSING the LADIES at the THEATRE. Her salary will be handsome; and she will be allowed tea and small beer into the bargain. None need apply but such as are perfectly acquainted with the business, and can produce undeniable references. –A line addressed to the committee will be duly attended to. –N.B. A widow will be preferred.

WANTED immediately, a few BALES of READY WIT, done up in small parcels for the Winter Chronicle. This article being scarce in the market, a good price may be depended on. Samples will be received by A.B., Agent to the Editor. Please apply on or before Thursday evening next.

LOST, on MOnday evening last, between the two Ships, a PART of a LETTER, giving an acount of the proceedings of the Expedition, with other matters of a private nature, and beginning “My dearest Susan.” –Whoever has found the same is requested to address it, L.A., Editor’s box. N.B. The letter is of no use to anybody but the owner.

FOR SALE BY AUCTION,by NICHOLAS KNOCKDOWN, at the Observatory, on the Coldest Day in January next, A QUANTITY of NANKEEN, the property of a Gentleman, who expected to get into the Pacific in September last.

**Flannels and furs will be gladly taken as payment.

Institutional Garbage: Rowland Saifi

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Rowland Saifi, “Statement for a Configured Curriculum,” 2016


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Institutional Garbage: Fiep van Bodegom

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Fiep van Bodegom, “ongedateerd contract tussen potentiele ouder en ongeboren kind,” The Multinational Book of Contracts: Contracts from the Dutch Institute, 2016

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